Saturday, May 21, 2011

The Real Secret to Connecting with People

To connect with people, we pay attention to their needs and think how our value can help them meet their needs or solve their problems.

So it is always about them (our audience’s needs and problems), never about us.
Many people can gain from the value we create and the benefits we offer. So our success does not depend on any one particular member of the audience.

On the other hand, each member of the audience depends wholly on the value we create and the benefits we offer vis-à-vis their problem or need.

It’s like the story of the boy and the starfish.

One day, a boy and his friend were walking along a sandy beach. Many starfish washed up by the waves were strewn across the sandy beach, dying. The starfish desperately need to return to the sea quickly or they will die. The boy, seeing the dire situation of the starfish, bended over, picked up one starfish and threw it back into the sea. His friend asked: “Why did you do that? What difference would it make? There are so many starfish lying on the beach.” To this the boy replied as he picked up another starfish, flinging it back into the sea, “I made a world of difference to that one.”

So focus on seeing where people need help with their problems or needs, while we create value. Focus on how the values we create can benefit our audience and solve their problems, thus making a positive difference for each individual.


  1. I hope that you are well. I am accustomed to daily posts from you. Hope all is well with you. We miss your pithy, succinct bits of wisdom.

  2. Thanks Inspector for your kind thoughts and encouraging feedback! I am well. Been rearranging my life and work. Nearly done, and am back. Glad you found the work helpful.